Wednesday, 25 March 2009

Sappy heroines

Okay, I think my heroine might have misread her brief - I specified "sassy heroine" when I was doing my casting but somehow she's mislaid a couple of consonants and is veering dangerously into sappy territory...

For some reason she's turning out to be far more vulnerable than I intended so I think I might do a quick re-write of the second chapter just to bury her angst a little further under the surface. After all she's going to need her strength for the Black Moment when I reveal that Luke is not who she thought he was (shock horror ;-)

I wonder if my own mood creeps into my writing more often than I realise. Does anyone else have this problem? I am feeling a little vulnerable at the moment, having discovered the fact that my symptoms from my head injury are wider than I first realised. At first when the doctors asked if I had memory problems I said I didn't think so - it turns out that I have, I just couldn't remember them!

It started with a spate of proof that I hadn't actually done things I was convinced I had and had done things I didn't think I had (confused? welcome to the club!). It was compounded by evidence of objects I'd left in very odd places - at first only a few that I noticed but when I probed further it became clear that I've been doing this a lot only people didn't want to mention anything.

All fairly minor so far, inconvenient but nothing that can't be got round by becoming List Woman but then yesterday I went to see a very good friend I've known for years and suddenly realised that I didn't know how old I was. In fact I was absolutely convinced I was an age I wasn't - even when provided with evidence and calculations to explain it it didn't make sense. I checked with my husband last night and got into a bit of a state when I realised that I was in fact wrong but still couldn't compute the sums.
(My mental arithmetic is shot to pieces lately. Not great given my money earning career is with numbers.)

P.S. Before anyone asks yes I am going back to the doctor and this time I am writing down a list of my symptoms so I don't forget to tell him what they are!


Joanne Cleary said...

Aw Lorraine, bless you. What a terribly difficult situation to be in. Perhaps ask family or a friend to go with you to the doctors so nothing is left out? Especially if they have been trying to protect you from some of your symptoms.

I think you are doing well to even be writing at all just now. If I am upset about anything I can't get my words out.

Lots and lots of love coming your way.

Jackie Ashenden said...

Lorraine, get thee to a doctor's surgery quick smart!! I'm with Jo here, get your hubby to go with you. You could probably do with an MRI just to check what's going on. In fact, they should have given you one to start off with. Stupid NHS. Sounds almost as stupid as the hospital system down this end of the world.

But yep, bigs hugs to you. And BTW, I reckon your heroine as a secret core of steel :-)

Rachael Johns said...

Lorraine - Jo and Jackie offer sound advice!!! Big hugs and let us now how you go!!!

I reckon you're right about our own mood creeping into writing, so if you're really worried, why not just give yourself permission to read or write something else for a few days until all this is over :)

Lorraine said...

Thanks guys, I find keeping myself thinking about writing and doing little bits here and there does really help - if not I'd probably get really depressed.

Actually I think my heroine does have the capacity to get seriously stroppy (my own mood coming in again? Surely not ;-)

Romy said...

Hugs to you, Lorraine. At least a difficult time like this can show you just how much love and support you have in your life.

And one day this is all going to make a great basis for a novel!

Lorraine said...

Thanks Romy,

Yes those amnesia themes are quite popular aren't they? Jo came up with a good suggestion that I have a hero hit the heroine over the head (accidentally) and insist on taking care of her and I quite like the idea.

Funnily enough I was checking my age with my mother in law (just to make sure my husband and best friend weren't wrong!) and she told me she had full amnesia after she gave birth to my husband and for days had no idea she even had a baby and didn't know why she was in hospital!

Joanne Cleary said...

Wow! Those must have been some seriously strong childbirth drugs!!

And there's another idea for a story ... h wakes up in hospital no idea she's had a baby or is married ... has to bond with baby and fall in love with husband all over again. Awwww ... only he is the man who took over her father's company and the last man she would ever married ... so why did she?

How cool is your mil with her story ideas?!

Btw, if you ever struggle with your age again, ask me. We're the same age and I'm fairly certain I'm not a day over 25 :-)

Suzanne said...

Oh Lorraine, that must be so scary.

Cyber hugs (())

Lorraine said...

Suzanne - Thanks, it feels a bit weird to be honest.

Jo - You're not doing so badly with the story ideas yourself! Now I'm fairly sure I'm not 25, if I am I'm doing very badly for my age!!!