If you can't stand the heat...

then go and bury yourself in a snowdrift. Well that's my motto and I'm sticking to it.

Seriously. Blundering around in sub zero temperatures in the dark, trying to find the key to your swiss chalet (and indeed the chalet itself), slipping on a vicious patch of black ice and the ensuing pain seeping through your limbs...Well it's an excellent distraction from wondering if anyone at Richmond liked your competition entry at all.

Think of it not so much as a NTAI last minute holiday in the Alps as an opportunity to have more distraction providing accidents. Although as my last two bizarre accidents involved the leg of the ironing board and the lid of the laundry basket (I must be the only person in the world to injure themselves with wicker, surely?) I have to say I prefer the view here.

Pass the ibuprofen...

Definitely, absolutely NTAI

I am definitely, absolutely not doing any of the following:

1. Wondering if my competition entry has made the shortlist mentioned in the contest update
2. Thinking about how I'll feel if I get the generic 'abandon this project' email I got back from the competition last year.
3. Wishing I was satisfied with the final edit I carried out under the fug of flu.
4. Feeling depressed about my 'time passed to writing accomplished' ratio in recent months.

Although I have to admit that as the deadline draws nearer NTAI is becoming harder and harder. I'm trying to work on my other partial, employing what seems like perfect logic to me - that if I don't work on 'Reluctant Heir, Passionate Affair' then they'll want to see it... Hmm, well it seemed logical before I wrote it down :-)

How are you all bearing up?

Tonic?

The neurophysiotherapist who is torturing, sorry I mean rehabilitating, me on a regular basis took one look at me last week and said "You look like you need a tonic."

Decided not to say "Yes, a gin and..." as she's an ultra healthy gym bunny. Was slightly depressed that after a month of viral bugs clinging to me like limpets I clearly look as bad as I feel.

Not being one for neat cod liver oil I prescribed myself a bit of rest and more watching of Michael Weatherly (obsessed, moi?) from my NCIS boxset when I suddenly got fresh inspiration for 'Secret Billionaire'. The part where Tony is deceiving Jeanne (apologies to non NCIS fans here) and yet falling in love with her and knowing it can't end well - it provoked me to start thinking more deeply about Luke and how he'd be feeling, why he'd be doing what he's doing and most importantly why on earth any reader should love a hero who starts off in a place of deception.

He'd changed so much with the revisions I didn't feel I knew him very well but now I've got to know him properly I realise I do actually love my hero again. Quite important really.

I've made brief contact with my missing Mojo who is still in Cannes claiming to be doing 'research' (the virtual chocs go to Jackie as a reward :-) but refuses to come back until it stops raining.

So I'll make a start anyway and hope Mojo comes back to join me at some point...

Lost

Lost:

One Mojo, last seen being gagged and bound by a vicious flu bug but passed on to his friend the common cold who was lurking, waiting his turn.

Whereabouts currently unknown but no ransom demands made as yet.

Please report any sightings (The Pub in the M&B Community has been searched already but without success).

News that there have been 544 entries into the M&B competition could be lowering the Mojo's morale. Coaxing with either jaffa cakes or chocolate digestives may be effective.

Reward:

To be negotiated (but I do a good line in virtual chocolate :-)

Never Ever

Never ever:

1. re-read your competition entry after it's been sent
2. edit when you have flu

Have discovered hideously idiotic mistake in my chapter - the caretaker's wife inexplicably changes her name from Sofia to Maria mid chapter. How? How on earth could I miss this blatant character rebellion? Is it because I only gave her one line and described her as dour???

Aargh. I knew it was a bad idea to read but did it anyway. Like buying a tube of Pringles and thinking you'll only eat a handful, it had that same feeling of inevitability about it.

Sigh.

Has any else caved and re-read their entry? Can anyone beat my mistake?

P.S.L.D

Following on from Suzanne's suggestion that we should campaign for Competition Obsessive Disorder to be recognised as a legitimate ailment I've identified another affliction - Post Sending Let Down.

It's a bit like that post exam feeling - you've revised, got through the exams and now you've got to wait and try and forget about it until you get your results. Almost as soon as I hit send on my competition entry the slumps hit me, although to be fair my being post viral hasn't helped.

I also think the M&B competition is much worse than any exam - you can revise your socks off, read every writing book available, absorb every forum comment going and still not get any feedback at all (gosh, I'm really cheery this morning aren't I? ;-).

Last year I sent off an entry I really quite liked and waited hopefully, in vain as it happened. This year I'm savvier (I hope), I am also completely sockless (literally as it happens, the sock monster is very active in my house) and suffering from PSLD.

It will pass I'm sure. I've prescribed myself listening to 'Azur Like it' to get back into French Riveria/'Secret Billionaire' mode and also much watching of Michael Weatherly in my NCIS dvds :-)

Competition Obsessive Disorder

If you've entered the Mills and Boon competition or are just about to, then the above condition requires no further explanation.

Symptoms may include muttering about internal conflict in your sleep or trying to explain the 'action and reaction' thing (explained so beautifully by Jackie) to non writing 'civilians'.

Distractions from Competition Obsessive Disorder to date:

1. A baby cold picked up in Liverpool that has now grown to the kind of monster proportions favoured by King Kong, Godzilla et al.
2. A bizarre accident involving the leg of the ironing board and my nose (don't ask).
3. Listening to "Passion" by Louise Bagshawe, so utterly engaging that my own writing feels even more hobbyish than usual.
4. Remembering there are things other than writing that matter in life. Like erm...er...