I don't normally need help to get into a mess. Since my head injury I frequently reverse things (hot instead of cold, up instead of down etc). This can lead to mild confusion i.e. when I say I've injured my left knee instead of my right. Or complete chaos when I write a message asking someone to do the exact opposite of what I want them to do, then misread a text message by reversing one word and omitting another... Confused yet? Try being me for a bit ;-) Better still try writing a book and having to laboriously check everything a million times.
However someone up there must be bored and has decided to assist this week in upping the mayhem quota - resulting in an x-ray technician x-raying the wrong part of me ('Computer says do what's on the form' never mind the human patient in front of you telling you it's wrong) and being given a faulty TENS machine which emitted random, unexpected surges so powerful they made my muscles jerk. Quite difficult when you're trying to talk to people and they have no idea you're hooked up. Funny? Well not if the electrodes are attached to you it's not, no...
Even my dogs have decided to lend a paw. Two nights ago Poppy (left) managed to lock me out of my house. It seems mildly amusing now she was able to shoot the bolt across the kitchen door, leaving me trapped in the garden room but I assure you it wasn't so funny at the time. Daredevil in a splint was on the other side of the door (up to goodness knows what circus antics) and I was shoe-less, phone-less and in dire need of the loo.
As my keys were still on the inside of the front door my initial plan of waiting for someone with a key to turn up and rescue me was pointless. Instead I had to traipse through the mud in my socks, climb through a hedge into next door's garden and try not to look too deranged when I knocked on the door. Thankfully the neighbour is a forensic police person who managed to break open the door and then replace the lock without any visible sign that the door had been forced. It's a little worrying someone can break in and replace the lock without me noticing but for the moment I'm merely relieved I didn't have to ring the fire brigade. Otherwise I would now be in the 'stupidest reasons for callout' book.
Enough is enough. I'm taking a deep breath and putting an end to the recent spate of bad luck. At least I have my Mills and Boon 'Make a Bag out of a Book cover' comp win to cheer me up (my entry is below). Although the email address I was given to claim my kindle prize doesn't seem to be working... Perhaps I need to take another deep breath ;-)